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How I love the Republicans. If they didn’t have such ridiculous ways about them, we’d not drool at the juicy opportunity to revel in their rot.

Apparently, Sarah Palin thinks she’s really special. So special in fact, that she considers herself hallowed ground when it comes to twisted humor. Now, every politician knows that being in the limelight comes with the great risk of being ridiculed & lampooned. But, if David Letterman chose to poke fun at the idea of nymphonecropedophiles having their way with Sarah’s new grandchild, I might cut Sarah some slack for her feeling offended. With the terrible state of the country (or should I say, cuntry) at large, and so many lives being torn to shreds over the economy, you’d think she could blather about something more meaningful than being likened to a slutty flight attendant by a late night comedian. Possibly, Sarah might be just the type of person who’d defend rich kids who have no job experience getting out of college, who also get monthly allowances of $10K a month for their overpriced life in condos all over Williamsburg & Bushwick, Brooklyn. And…once you put your kids on your expense reports, you’re fair game.

I should expect nothing less from the base of folks who think Ronald Reagan was the last noble human to walk the Earth. These creatures love to work themselves into a frothy lather over the “Good Old Gipper Days.” However, when I was growing up in the 80s, those years were pockmarked with crack vials littered everywhere in the streets, gunshots in the neighborhood at night, festering open lots filled with rats, stray dogs, abandoned cars…trash…tires, and the occasional murder victim. I bet Rush Limbaugh didn’t get mugged a few times on the way to and from grammar school. It’s too bad, he might have a human character behind those evil words of his.

In other news, New Yorkers are beating their chests in protest over a saucy ad by Calvin Klein. CK is just taking notice of the successes of American Apparel. This reporter is surprised by their spicy endeavor, but I, you may note, am not complaining one bit. =}

It’s truly great to have friends in influential positions. I’m sure if Treasury Secretary Paulson’s mother was battling a life threatening disease with no medical insurance & about to loose her home to foreclosure, there would have been a fierce bill proposed in an equally swift manner to tackle many of our nation’s ills long before this golden parachute for Wall Street. But that will never happen since he’s a Goldman Sachs alumnus…even if he up and quit tomorrow or G.W.B. fired him, Mr. Paulson could still live out wonderful years in lavish opulence…and he’d take care of mama (or at least one would hope).

Mr. Paulson effectively terrified Congress into approving a legally immune blank check to the tune of $700Bn+ for global financial behemoths within a week…and he doesn’t want CEO compensation capped for institutions that seek taxpayer money to save them from their own undoing. I’d think a CEO might put their avidity aside for a few moments rather than let their company go bust (but what the hell do I know). And, naturally, the lobbyists and financial servicing firms are wetting their shorts/frothing at the mouth at the prospect of getting their greedy paws on this legislation.

Isn’t it just too convenient that with so much deregulation, nobody is going to jail for any of this mess? Since the U.S. is diving head first towards socialism they should bring back 20 lashes in public square…with Angelo Mozilo first in line to receive his administrative punishment. Now that the argument for democracy/capitalism is dying, maybe they’ll finally cut Cuba some slack.

This just in from the Bush administration’s deregulation generals…”Taxpayers…we screwed up, and it will cost YOU a total of $900BN. This is money that we don’t have, but we’ll sell more of our soul to the global markets in order to pay for it. And just so do you don’t worry your hearts about wealthy executives feeling any real pain for their stuplidity, we’ll be sure that Robert B. Willumstad (CEO of A.I.G.) will get his $8.7MM severance package…even after we threw in $85BN to save his company. Furthermore, a mediocre apology goes out to the millions of homeowners loosing their properties to foreclosure…we won’t be saving you or your jobs, we, the Republicans, only worry about the rich, and if you’re in foreclosure…you’re not rich…so go pound salt.”